I must worn you that this blog is coming with a trigger warning. And, as always if you are triggered by it close your eyes and take four deep breaths in and four deep breaths out. Understand that triggers are present to come within ourself to figure out why we are being triggered. I was triggered, hence the reason I am writing this blog. 

I have a very big issue with positive reinforcement strategies being used in the younger grade classrooms. I do not think they should be used at all, however I will begin with the younger ones. Whether you are five, ten or fifteen years old your behavior is always based on someone else’s perception of you, especially if you have had a “past” with not meeting the expectations of the teacher and what they perceive as good behavior. Adolescents are still learning about themselves which comes a long with a lot of ways we can experience everything.

Do you believe that every experience that comes our way is to help us grow? Whether it’s good nor bad that experience is here to help us learn from whatever our universe has presented to us. The way we react to those experiences is how we learn, it’s all part of the process. Let’s take the five year old in kindergarten or pre-kindergarten who is not living up to his teachers expectations. (I’d like to remind you that we are unaware of his or her expectations to begin with because humans do not come with a robotic response to most cases they are presented with) I remember this always being a public aspect of the classroom. Your name was up on a big board with more or less stickers than your peers. How is this reinforcing a child’s behavior? All it is doing is leaving them upset, thinking they did something “wrong” if they were the ones with little or less or no stickers at all.

I was a child with a lot to say, always. As many of you are aware from my recent blogs I have been called a “story-teller” and quickly nicknamed “mouth” at a very young age. I was only speaking my truth, with respect.  I was always the child with barely any stickers. I also didn’t care, however there are many children out there that do. And, maybe I did care. I can say I didn’t care now. I am forty-three. Most of us at this age do not care what others think at this point in their lives. When you are five you more than likely do care and it’s a punch in the gut. Children should not be left feeling bad about their behavior.

We all “behave” differently. As children and adults. Our only job is to hold space for others behaviors. Everyone has a reason to behave the way they do. Children are still new to life with a lot more to experience. We are all here to experience different things to push us forward in life. We are always learning and growing from those experiences.

My theories on life are coming from a place of spiritual growth, enlightenment and enrichment. Many will not agree with my thoughts and that is okay. I am tired of the programs and what society has deemed right. I am speaking out for our children, the ones who haven’t quite found their “voice” yet and are only going by what they are told is right. A child feeling they are”less than” amongst their peers because they didn’t behave a certain way inside the classroom is wrong, especially when that behavior is being determined by another human being.

I am coming from a place as an adult who has struggled most of her life trying to figure out exactly who she is. I never felt like I “fit in” and the reason is because I don’t. I still don’t. It was only until recently that I have come to realize I do not want to. As I am writing this blog I am not only remembering some classroom childhood traumas I am feeling them on a very deep level. Once we change the way others respond to behaviors, children will change their response.

Love & Light, Always!

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