Grief is nothing less than an emotional pitfall filled with an overflowing heart wanting to hang on. Did I describe that well? I could go on and on about trying to explain the ins and outs on trying to fulfill the description on what it truly feels like. The thing is, it is very different for everyone. I truly do not think I have ever seen one grieve the same as another when it comes to loss. Loss is the strangest phenomenon of life. It is inevitable, yet once it hits us we really don’t know how to see the light when it happens, even when we try our hardest to do so. Once we master seeing the light in such a devastating time we then see that love really does conquer all.
“There are moments which mark your life; moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same and time is divided into two parts…BEFORE this and AFTER this”. -Unknown
I think that is the hardest part when our minds starts turning, its the overflow of memories, thoughts and; What now? I mean, yes there are pictures and thoughts that make our memories stay alive yet that will never be good enough until we come to terms with trying to truly find peace within ourselves as we maneuver life in such a different form, the before and after. I’ll never forget the first time I lost a soul so near and dear to my heart. I was four years old and I dreamt of her passing before it had happened, if you have read “A Sojourn Journey” I mentioned she was a cat. She wasn’t just a cat in my eyes, she was my bestie and the only one who understood me at the time, as any four year old would think. At the tender age of four my heart was completely shattered. The truth is her soul stayed alive and I remember being greeted by her many, many times after she had crossed over. It wasn’t known to me back then that I had a very special gift, a gift that I let go of and had found again much later on in my life. A gift in which we all have…Being able to connect with our loved ones after they cross over.
There is an inevitable challenge that comes with everything, Change. Change is the hardest part for us, well some of us. I have only realized that change, even the hardest parts of life can be okay if we put our mindset out there to believe that. You have heard me say this in so many of my writing pieces. Change is the part that I really think hits us and it is ultimately where our minds go. Losing someone and thinking of all the changes is so hard. It is the part where we are trying to imagine our lives without them and that is the biggest change of all. The questions in our minds start racing. It’s the unknown, its the part where fear sets in because we just do not know. We don’t know where to be at this very moment. We don’t know how to act, what to say and the biggest; How to move on. I think the moving on part is the hardest of all. Guilt sets in. That feeling of guilt when we do wake up in the morning, one day even happy, and we ask ourself; Am I suppose to be happy? Is it okay to be happy? The answer is, yes. Our loved ones want us to be happy. They want us to see the light and they absolutely want us to feel the love that we still hold near and dear in our hearts. There’s a lot that comes with losing someone we love. The emotional battle field hits everyone differently and time definitely does not heal all pain. I am still unsure if the pain of losing someone truly ever goes away, rather we eventually learn how to take that pain and turn it into something different, love. Hold on to that. It’s the love we have that hurts so bad. We all learn by experience, even our darkest ones. One cannot justify what another is feeling or going through during such difficult experiences in our lives. It is a time in our life where we start to understand the true meaning of love.
“When you believe beyond what your eyes can see, signs from Heaven show up to remind you that love never dies”. ~Julie Clapp
You may find that your loved ones who have departed will always be around. We do not need to be mediums in order to get signs and messages from them. You may start to feel chills running through your body and smell a certain smell that had always reminded you of them. You may even start seeing patterns knowing it is really them, they will keep giving you signs to validate to you that it is them showing up to show you love and grace. They want you to understand that although they are not physically a part of our lives, they are still here. Not in the way we wish, however they are still here. The departed soul never dies. You may start to hear their voice and then a memory will spark in pure delight.That is your intuition coming in to help you understand that what you are experiencing is very real. Once we learn to trust it we will start depending on our intuition to get us through life. The next time you are out and about or even just sitting still in the quiet midst of whatever you are doing, stay aware and present. If you feel a beautiful wind fly by you or you get a sudden chill go through your body and then you are hit with a memory, that is your loved one, now your guardian angel coming to say hello. They may even be popping in to help you with something they feel you are struggling with. That departed soul is checking in and helping you see the light in a very different way. A way in which we have a chance to stay connected, a chance to see, feel and love in a different way. Once we find ways to stay connected it becomes a little easier. Trust me, it never truly gets “Easy”. The burden. The heartache and burning feeling in our throat and chest when we hear a song or something else that reminds us just gets a little happier as time passes on, happier not easier. That one day comes when we can smile as the tears are rolling down our face.
Do you believe in receiving the energy and messages from souls who have crossed over? If you do, you can count on them to be in your life guiding you forever. Your body will “light up” with an energetic vibrational feeling that you will not mistaken for what it is. It is your intuition validating something for you, stay tuned in and you may even start getting messages. Messages come in the form of a memory that most people mistaken for something that has just popped up and most do not make the connection with the intuitive aspect of it. Signs come in all different forms. Smells, seeing things that may be a connection to your loved one, hearing a certain song come on over and over at the right time. There are so many ways that they will connect with you. Everything around us is energy and our loved ones who have crossed over are masters at manipulating the energy all around us. We just have to be open to realizing that it is them and not just a “coincidence”. I do not believe in coincidences. I believe that everything happens in it’s divine timing. One of the first intuitive messages I received from my grandfather was on our way home from his funeral. A song that we both loved came on. I got the chills and I knew it was him. From that day on anytime I would think of him and the radio would be on that song would come on. He loved birds and he was great at mimicking their whistles. There was always one bird in particular he connected with. I remember the birds coming as we would sit on his porch and he would sing the same tune. After his passing I would always here it and think of him followed by a flash memory to validate that it is him. Any one of us can do this. Remember, you just have to tune in and believe that the love of our loved ones soul never dies. You will eventually be able to make connections knowing in your soul that it is them showing up to remind you that they are always near.
Do you believe in soulmates? Soulmates come in all different forms. When we think of a soulmate we think of a bond of intimacy between two people, that’s not entirely true. I believe soul mates come in all energetic forms and beings. A soulmate is one where we can truly feel their soul, it is a very deep measure of love. Have you ever been out somewhere and have been around someone and said “ I know you from somewhere”, and then that awkward moment hits when you have two people standing there trying to figure it out and trying to remember and you are left with him or her not knowing you at all. A connection that never ever goes away. It’s strange in all ways imaginable and very real. I will never forget being a child and going places and staring at someone, feeling their energy and knowing deep down that I knew him or her. I’d say “I know you”! And, of course the adult whom I was with would always splat out their words of wisdom…”You think you know everyone”. There was truly no hope for me back then when I was not led to believe myself. It wasn’t my time to figure things out and eventually I just let the trust in myself fade as if it never existed. It was the grief of losing those I loved most that came back to show me and help me understand this beautiful part of life and that is; Our loved ones are always near as long as you open your heart to believe that.
Holidays are hard, especially the first ones. They hit like a ton of bricks. As hard as it may be, your loved ones want you to move on and celebrate just as you always did. The memories that make the holiday so special are special because they are a part of them. Even if they are not still here physically. You will feel their presence if you tune in. My best friend of almost thirty-five years lost her mother this year. I thought of her on Thanksgiving and remembered how my first holiday was without my father, it is so tough! She told me that she made stuffing and it tasted just like her moms. How amazing is that? A memory so near brought her moms presence to the table. There are many ways we can bring their presence to light. We just have to be open to the changes in making some new memories of the holiday season special as we include their light and love along the way. We eventually get to the understanding that we have so much love in our hearts and so many memories that were made that it becomes easier over time to make sure we include them to make occasions a little more joyous. The pain truly never goes away. There’s always that ache we feel deep within. At that moment close your eyes and think of a beautiful memory they have left you with. Hold on to that. Memories were made out of love and they were made to hold on to. Without love there would be no memories and without the two combined there would be only pain. It is the deepest love that causes so much pain and grief. Once we learn to let go of the grieving pain and turn it into love, that is when we are truly able to move on. Let your overflowing heart hang on to love, love it the deepest most profound essence of light. It is the love and light that we feel and see in our lives that brings us the most joy.
A prelude to something more…
Love and Light, Always.
Diana Rose Borisuck.
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